5 Lessons I Learned While Working on "Chaos to Calm"
While my clients come to me for writing help, they teach me even more
I sat on a fold-out chair with my high school best friend in the middle of an intimate Zibby’s Bookshop on Montana Blvd in Santa Monica. Hugged by hundreds of artistic covers of books lining shelves, we gathered to celebrate the launch of Chaos to Calm: Five Ways Busy Parents Can Break Free From Overwhelm by “The Queen of Calm” Jenna Hermans—a book I had the honor of helping write, organize, and contribute to from my own experiences as a working mom of two.
I made eye contact with Jenna as she introduced herself to the group, and we both teared up, knowing the years of work and love that went into making this night happen.
A warm, real, engaging talk with Jenna and author Fran Hauser (of Fran’s Bookshelf, and The Myth of the Nice Girl) ensued.
I heard compelling questions raised from interested readers. My favorite: “Which of your tips do you find hardest to use yourself?”
Getting to see the book from the point of view of a reader made me realize just how much I myself had learned from Jenna’s concepts by being part if its creation.
5 Lessons I Learned While Working on Chaos to Calm
I have permission and an obligation to take care of myself before I can be my best for those I love. This means if my body is screaming at me to lay down, I do so and do not feel guilty about it. Saying “no thank you” to doing an activity that exhausts me is saying “yes” to me.
I can achieve big things by starting super small. I have been increasing the number of sit-ups I do every night by literally only one per night. Progress is perfect.
I can make it easier to create a healthy habit by decreasing obstacles to it. For example, I drink more water now, because I leave my water bottle lid open so I don’t even have to open it to sip.
If I put everything in the calendar, even commutes or time to think about an issue and tasks, I’ll know I’m not over-saturating my time.
If it’s not life or death, I can let it go. This one is challenging for me, because I take even an angry driver flipping me off personally (which has been particularly difficult living in L.A.), but perspective is everything.
An invaluable gift of being a writer-for-others is how much I learn. Whether writing a memoir scene set in a time period I’m unfamiliar with (like the birth scene in 1950 in (It’s Not a Rumour) or assisting in a nonfiction book about how to not lose yourself while navigating a career and parenthood, I always finish a project a better person.
Thank you for that gift, Jenna!